So I want to be a “real” games journalist.

I’ve always wanted to write about videogames.

Now that might sound like the most primitive and cliched way to start a story like this, but it’s the honest truth. After five years of continuous freelancing I finally feel like I possess enough confidence and worthwhile ability to approach games writing as not only an enthusiast hobby, but as a full blown career. Finding work in games media is more impenetrable than ever, with thousands upon thousands of enthusiast writers clamouring at the feet of websites and companies, desperate to make their mark. On the flipside however, it’s also much easier. The abundance of platforms available can turn your average gamer into a profession wielding juggernaut assuming they possess such a mindset. Sites such as Youtube, Blogger and the incomprehensible swarm of independent websites makes for the ideal training ground for budding writers and content producers. So what makes me any different? The truth is I don’t have a clue. I’m a guy with a love for games, anime, and all things nerdy that I transferred that love into a talent I can proudly yield like a creative scimitar (the coolest of swords).

I began my freelance writing career in 2010 (I was 15 at the time) purely covering UK anime releases amidst the occasional JRPG or muted convention. This allowed me to cut my teeth within a niche that established my knowledge in a particular genre. This gave me the the wide berth I needed to cement myself in a small circle of websites and people that has done nothing but grow ever since. So along with a lot of hard work and significantly more luck I’ve amassed a portfolio across several websites and subjects. But I’d be kidding myself if I said I didn’t have a lot to learn. I still screw up on a regular basis, questioning the thoughts in my head that tell me I should stop being a fool and give up the chase. Though every tweet, like and genuine response that’s thrown at my work (even from my mum) has spurred me onward. I still grin like an idiot when someone in the gaming space I admire follows me on twitter. It’s all about the little things that fuel my motivation, reassuring me I’m in it for not only my love of the medium, but for the love of writing and the possibility of making something meaningful.

The idea of penetrating the industry is an exciting yet simultaneously terrifying prospect to me. Where would I start? What do I do? Can I buy a pug now? Ignore that last one. What I’m saying is the audience and how they consume content fluctuates so unpredictably nowadays that approaching it with perfection is almost impossible. I think written opinion dissipating completely is impossible, but to many video is their main source of gaming media. In the past few years many traditional outlets have dropped like flies. Whilst sites such as Gamespot, Giant Bomb and Eurogamer are creating an amalgamation of content that pioneers the current status quo without completely abandoning their well watered roots. People like Jeff Gerstmann, Kevin VanOrd and Danny O’Dwyer, members of the industry I practically idolized have embraced and now lead the charge on what we expect from games journalism. This defines the idea of being a game journalist as even more enticing to me. The opportunity to work alongside these people is a realistic goal, and one I’m steadily on my way to achieving.

I say this with more clarity after recently attending EGX Rezzed, a small, indie-focused games convention. The smaller and more intimate scale gave the event an almost relaxing atmosphere. Striking up a face to face conversation with professionals in the industry you before only knew through a screen was incredibly easy. I spent hours swapping questions and advice with the likes of Eurogamer’s Chris Bratt and Gamespot’s Lucy James. Coming away feeling better about my occupational intentions than ever before. The best part about all this was we all shared a common interest, our love of the medium in which we work and create. Whether they ended up in their situation through brutal determination or a laughable coincidence, the adoration of video games nestles at the centre of it all. Whoa, this is getting deep.

One vital thing I’ve learnt is to never be afraid of reaching out, whether this be asking a writer on twitter to have a quick read of your work or seeking out a freelance position with a smaller website. Show them what you’ve got! If you happen to have that special something then someone is eventually going to take notice. Admittedly I grew used to the fleetless feeling of throwing my work at numerous twitter handles only to be met with silence, but the possibility of a response in itself was enough to drive me forward. If you really enjoy a particular person’s work then be sure to let them know. Most of the time they are just as interested in some form of feedback as you are. Through this you will grow as a creator and hone your craft. I still feel like an insignificant blip on the radar, but at times even I feel like I could do anything given the circumstances. I couldn’t sit in a bath full of tarantulas though, just ask me to write about videogames or puppies.

A few days ago someone told me never to let yourself pour so much into something that you slowly come to hate it. Progressing to a point where you devote your entire self to achieving a goal is far more detrimental than beneficial. I would happily apply this to any passion, let alone games writing. I’ve burnt myself out over games before in the past. Going through a period where I failed to invest myself in even when playing the latest games, let alone writing about the damn things. Past experiences like this are a worrisome realisation in a future where I very well may find myself writing,talking and doing stupid stuff about videogames for a living. Despite the plethora of directions such a career would spiral into the niggling doubts still lay dormant in the back of my mind. Paranoia similar to this is a stigma associated with all professions, but feels especially striking in an industry where the work ethic and content within it can fluctuate so unpredictably. However this landscape provides a challenge that I’m happy to acknowledge. I’m ready and willing to dive headfirst into an industry that may just as easily smack me like a little bitch and spit me back out.

So after five years of freelancing without a single pathetic penny to show for it I’m feeling more confident than ever about my future aspirations. I know where I want to be in the industry in the coming years, and won’t stop until I’ve gone about making it happen. Some people have laughed in my face when I told them about my passion for the industry and pursuing a career within it, blissfully unaware of the colossal impact videogames are making in society. Games are bigger than ever, and having grown up with them I’m taken aback by how far they’ve come. Being the person to unravel, converse and delve deeper into what makes them happen is a dream for me. I’m ambitious, nervous and most importantly I’m absolutely determined.